I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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