i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Randomize
