After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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