Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
