Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Randomize
