well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
