Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Randomize
