i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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