The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize