Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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