they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
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