hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
