Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
How naked do you want me to be?
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