nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I had to cum in my sink.
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