i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
