Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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