And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
