Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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