So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
