Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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