Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
