Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
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