so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
a search helicopter?!
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
