NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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