so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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