Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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