Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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