Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Randomize
