i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
