I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
we should paint friendship bongs
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
