we're blogging at a bar
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
