I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
