It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
