Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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