If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
