yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
Randomize
