tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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