White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
should my penis look like a turkey
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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