Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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