nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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