if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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