So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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