You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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