we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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