Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Randomize
