It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
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