Plan B is the new Plan A
grandma shit on top of the toilet
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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