Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
