plz talk dirty to me
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Randomize
