i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
